Sunday, July 17, 2011

REPOST: Pagpunta Kong New York... (November 11, 2008)

If I have enough endurance and time... I would have re-written this and translated this to English. I am so disgusted with my gay-colloquial ligo here. Haha. Eeew. Nonetheless, I felt nostalgic about this. I was so young and naive. I am so un-wise but I am so happy. Yet in my real life, I was bored with my office life... But New York made me happy and cheers me up everyday...

Saturday, July 16, 2011

REPOST: My Heart is in New York (October 31, 2008)

I wrote this poem on my 26th birthday, the best birthday gift I thought I had. I thought I'm flying soon to New York because my U.S. petition papers came through and Atreyu and I were both approved... I think I loved New York like a romantic lover. This poem sounds so passionate...

"My Heart is New York"

I belong to you
And you belong to me
I am your missing piece
That shall complete
Your sparks in heat
It's me, Tracy.
It's me!
Please wait for me,
My new york.
I long for your
Warm embrace
On a cold night
I can't wait
To cuddle underneath
Your wings and might
I can be your slave
And you will be my master
You are the beautiful muse
In the eyes of this enchanted beholder
i am your loyal lover
Forever and ever
I still long for you
Even a million years after
I can be anything or whatever
But if you permit,
I can be your top designer!
As long as you're mine
I will live happily ever after!

**para sa natatanging laman ng aking puso, you've got it all, my new york**
**inspirado sa good vibes na aking nararamdaman**
**malapit na tayong magkasama aking sinisintang, new york**

For the only matter in my heart, you've got it all, my New York
Inspired with the good vibrations that I'm feeling
Soon I will see you soon, my beloved, New York 

REPOST: Catharsis Attempt (January 12, 2009)

In the spirit of New York... I reposted this old blog entry of mine... 

new york new york new york new york new york new york new york

In the Spirit of New York...

This blog entry (and the next succeeding entries) are most especially dedicated to Taka in the spirit of his coming trip to New York. I envy you in green

New York... You inspired me with my best works
Everybody knows that I am the ultimate New York freak-girl. I miss loving New York, actually. It's been a while since I've obsessed about you. But you know I still love you, right? You should! From every Gossip Girl episode I've watched 2-3 times a week, Sex and the City marathons and so much more. You know, I love you, keikei?

You inspired me with my best works and for that I am forever grateful. You gave me the best hopes of my life to see you again and seek life with you. But it has't been easy. I gave up on you so many times and you've broken my heart so many times that sometimes... Gave me false hopes, you've broken my heart so many times. But still my love for you still rakes the best creations I have made in my life. Someday, we'll see you. Atreyu heard so much about you, you know... It would be such a shame if you don't meet someday. 

As Taka goes to New York, it's so much fun to relive my daydreaming days, fantasizing how I wanna see New York. May be a little bit different from how I want to see New York a few years back... But there's still so much to love about you.  If I was to visit New York I'll probably want to see these may places... Haha this sound like my Version 2.0 of my old blog before... "Pag punta kong New York..." ("When I come to New York") I'm writing so happily now thinking about New York

John Lennon, the legendary
adopted New Yorker  (he's Brit)
A Walk in the Park~ Central Park

It must be a cliche and I've said this a million and a half times already but I'd say it again... I wanna see "Strawberry Fields" ~ the memorial place dedicated to music legend, John Lennon. John Lennon was shot dead in New York City in the 80's. John and Yoko were strong advocates of peace back in the Vietnam War Days... This memorial area for John Lennon must have such serene feeling to be. The famous line, "Imagine" brings me goosebumps. It must be such a peaceful place to see. 

"Strawberry Fields" 
Photo c/o: Gelo Arucan

"Let me take you down coz I'm going to.... Stawberry Fields... Nothing is real"
Photo c/o: Gelo Arucan

Pop Art: MoMA.

The Museum of Modern Art
I have always considered myself as a faithful Modern Art advocate. Art is everywhere and  not only contained in art schools, critiques and exclusive groups. The Museum of Modern Art is the home of the most revolutionary modern art in art history. It's just exhilarating and stimulating... to generate beauty in unexpected things, places, matters and ideas... MoMA should be one of the Mecca of any artist at heart.  Andy Warhol's legendary pieces: Marilyn Monroe, Campbell Soup... Roy Lichtenstein's are few of my personal Pop Art pieces. I wish I could see them i real life and have a "moment" with each pieces. It must be such an inspiring moment... to connect with them in real life. If I was to go to New York this is definitely a must see place and I'll probably get myself a postcard from there and send it all off to my postcard friends! I'll take an artsy photo shot of myself with every artwork I love and I'll probably look at them always haha! Someday. For now, I am happy to look at my friend's Facebook pages with MoMA pictures. 

Andy Warhol's Marilyn Monroe: I'm so inspired by this!
Someday... I will get to have a picture like this with the Campbell Soup Paintings of Andy Warhol...
... or with Roy Lichtenstein's "Drowning Girl"

The Eclectic  Greenwich Village

Betsey Johnson's famous apartment
in Greenwich Village
Thanks to my Fashion Goddess... Betsey Johnson... Whom I respect sooo much from the day I decided to aspire to be a fashion designer... I now have this fascination for the eclectic place of the Greenwich Village. I don't really know what to see there but I'm just fascinated with it. I heard it's the "Bohemian Capital". So it must be interesting to see.

The Eclectic depiction of "Bohemian Greenwich Lifestyle"
The NYC Subway

NYC Subway Photo by:
Armi Rae Cacanindin
Of course, as I've said before and time again, I love train rides. I've never been in the NYC Subway. Must be scary haha! But I still look forward to the day that I can see the real deal with them. Must be a great adventure to have. To get lost to find my way... To see different faces of the real New Yorkers. The Subway is the ultimate New York Adventure! The hardcore fast phased urban city life. This is the Urban Jungle! Oh Someday I'll have a train photo with in NYC! I promise that!

Subway Art Photo by: Armi Rae Cacanindin

More Subway Art by Armi Rae Cacanindin

Grand Central Station Photo by: Armi Rae Cacanindin
"The American Dream" 

The Larger than Life NYC
A romantic notion, as cliche and as a fairytale. The idealistic thought of "All men are created equal". May be I live by this romantic notion may be sounding as derangement as I could be. As long as I'm living,New York will always be my "American Dream" where people are diversed, ideas are as high at the city's skyscrapers  People from all walks of life live. Live as free human beings. May be it's time to dream of NewYork again. Aim higher while I live my life everyday. Thank you, my dear New York. You will always be my spark of hope. My race may seem to be a marathon than a sprint. But I will get there.

Busy streets everyone going somewhere...

... I suddenly remembered this lines from "Memoirs of a Geisha",

“Every step I have taken in my life since I was a child… I have taken in the hope of bringing myself closer to you.”
- Sayuri, "Memoirs of a Geisha"

Bring my love to New York, my love for you, both.  As I dedicate this entry for you, I'll wish you to be filled with such overwhelming great feeling of hope and optimism to the future. New York will be good for you. Someday I'll see New York with you...

Sunday, July 03, 2011

"Faith and trust all you need is pixie dust." -Tinkerbell

Because I have delusional mind, I have convinced myself I am a fairy haha. Well, I keep telling my boyfriend "I'm the manic pixie dream girl" haha. Atreyu keeps telling his classmates, "My mom has secret fairy wings" I don't know if they believe it. But they are kids may be they do. Haha!

Tinkerbell said, "Faith and trust... all you need is pixie dust" to fly... She's my favorite entity... She said that just think of happy thoughts and we could fly. How I wish that's true and I'll fill my mind with so much happy thoughts so I can fly to Japan right now. Tinkerbell, can I borrow your wings now?

Well I don't think I can. But nonetheless I will just fill this with happy thoughts and wishlist of things I oddly want to have and typical girl things I want... May be "Fantasizing" is the happiest defense mechanism. But I gotta cope up! 

Happy thought #1: That cute polka dot red shoes

Hello darling! Haha! Oh I miss you so much! Why aren't you visiting me in my dreams anymore? Oh I get the best sleep when I wake-up I'm wearing you! I thought I'm gonna have you soon but I need to be patient or be more resilient.  
I really thought I will be wearing you when I come to Japan. Oh I still wish I could have you. They say the more I claim it, it's mine. You are mine soon. Please be in my dreams tonight. Make me a happy girl in the morning. My mornings have been so lonely past few days... please come to my dream again...

Happy thought #2: I want my own colored xerox machine hahaha!

Oh I would definitely be so happy and be so unbored if I have this at my disposal! Hahaha! I will colored xerox everything and anything I want! Haha!

I remember, I used to have this privilege when I was working in an office. Oh I was such a happy colored-xerox girl!! Sometimes I get over excited ink runs out easily haha but if I have this, I'll make so many things and send to all my friends and I'll send my boyfriend more of everything haha he won't run out of things to read and see. I wonder where I'll put this though hahahaha

Happy thought #3: To have more of this...

How I wish I can look at more photos with us together. How I wish I can fly to Osaka now.  And just take photos here, there and everywhere.

I really just miss him so much.

Tinkerbell, can you work you pixie dust on any of my wishes? Please?