Saturday, April 16, 2016

Un-Masochista Intima

Un-Masochista Intima

As I got bitterer I learned
To fight back
No more underdog dilemmas
I learned to attack

No more martyr momma
No more crying mantras
No more masochistic drama
Un-masochista Intima

Underneath my brutal
Hazy past
I learned how to handle
To make things last
To quit while I'm ahead
I'll be gone before
You make your bed

Easily a prey came after another
Their feelings don't even bother
Enjoying uncommitted moments together
I learned the art of un-serious-matters
Then came the month of November
How it started I cannot remember

A bit haze and clouded judgment
I'm a prey I didn't intend
What happened came so fast
I was left in this confusing vast
With black-outs and shaded memory
What happened was far less than fantasy
But all was a heap of burdened misery




It's suddenly became your word against me
I cannot bring myself to deny me
To purge myself and save thee
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
All I know now is to, first, love me.
From the masochistic old me,
I became opposite of me.

- Friday, December 24, 2010


I'm so amazed I saw this draft in my FB Notes Drafts, thanks to this new FB format again... But I'm amazed that I wrote this poem roughly three years ago. Amazeballs. Haha!

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